I am always trying to teach my children to be happy with what they have and not to complain about what they are not getting or that others are. As you can imagine it's not a lesson easily learned. Even I haven't quite come to terms with it, sometimes wanting a bigger house or a newer car. But I continue to pursue the instruction with my children, hoping one day it will sink in and allow them to be content.
Right now my 4-yr old is having a difficult time with this. He is constantly whining that the older kids get to go to someone's house or play a sport or have a electronic device he's just to young to use. It's a daily battle to make him understand that his time will come and to enjoy what he has right now.
A couple of weeks ago we had a moment that I thought would really reinforce the lesson. One afternoon my two girls had a doctor's appointment. I had taken Lil B with us and of course he cried and whined the whole time about how unfair it was that he did not get a doctor's appointment too. Though I tried to explain it was a check-up and his turn would come soon enough he just couldn't let it go. While there the doctor suggested some shots for the girls and there was one that Lil B needed as well. She said she could have them all taken care of right then so I wouldn't have to make a return trip. I thought that was a fine idea.
As we waited for the nurse I told the girls that they were going to get two shots each and Lil B that he would get one. Of course the crying started immediately.
"That's not fair! They always get more than me. Why do they get two and I only get one?"
I tried to explain to him that he didn't want two shots and that he should be happy with just the one. He didn't buy it. Some how he felt was still getting cheated. As the nurse came in he jumped up on the table to be the first. Surprised by his eagerness the nurse prepared to give him the shot. As I held his hands she pushed the needle into his thigh, it was at this moment that he was no longer disappointed to only be receiving one shot.
I asked him if he still wanted to be equal to the girls and through his tears he agreed one shot was enough. I had hoped this lesson would stick with him at least for a little while, alas it would only be moments before he would be noting another injustice.
This story reminds me of going out to eat with the family before restuarants commonly offered free soda refills.
ReplyDeleteAs the oldest, I was always cognizant of the fact my younger siblings closely scrutinized anything I received with an eye for calling out injustices.
I loved soda and received it very rarely at home, so when I received a full glass at a restuarant, my natural inclination was to keep the fluid running through the straw until the cup was empty, only to be told, No Refill. And I would have to eat the rest of the meal dry...
So, I learned to conserve my soda... only to watch my younger siblings suck all theirs down before the entree and receive refills...
...injustice...