Monday, October 7, 2013

And I thought that was scary.......

One of the scariest things I ever did was to walk into work one day and say "I've decided to be a Stay-at-Home-Mom." Of course at the time I didn't think it was scary, it was liberating. I would now be able to be with my child (and the one that was on the way) all day every day! We would go to the park, shop at the mall, eat lunch with friends, oh the list of things to do just went on and on. It wasn't until about two weeks later when I had worn out my welcome at all my friend's places of work, I'm sure my husband was wondering if a daily 2 hour visit to the shop was necessary, my last paycheck had been spent and the house looked like a frat party had taken place there that reality suddenly set in.

I had just given up my paycheck, my work life and I was not on vacation. The housework had to be done, the baby had to be entertained (guess who was responsible),  not everybody (especially those people who didn't have kids yet) enjoys eating lunch while your child shoved smashed bananas and peas up their nose and the list of things to get done just went on and on and on.  I suddenly realized that those couple of weeks of fun were now over. I had to watch every penny I spent, so no more grand shopping trips and lunches out, life had to be scheduled around naps and eating, long conversations over a nice lunch were a thing of the past, and soon I would have two little people demanding my constant attention. What was I thinking?!

It took a couple (ok several years and a few more kids) for me to finally settle into a routine and to truly adjust to life as a stay-at-home mom. I found ways to entertain the kids and not all of them made me feel like I was going insane. I started a playgroup, joined a bible study, watched other peoples kids. I learned that I did not have to listen to the Wiggles siging "Fruit Salad" for 12 hours straight, that my kids actually liked real music so it wasn't necessary to torture myself with weird kid's music day after day. I made new friends and took time out now and then to visit with old ones (even sometimes without kids). And I realized that sometimes the best things were those like a night out at Target on my own after a long day. I learned to live in chaos and yet truly appreciate order. And I found the joy of a noisy household and the bliss of a few quiet moments. I finally figured out that though the housework did have to be done it wasn't all on me and a little dirt on the floor never hurt anyone even if they were eating a raisin off it. I found what worked for us.

Then one day I realized that my kids weren't little anymore. My oldest was entering 8th grade and my youngest was beginning 1/2 day at a local preschool. So what did I want to do with my "free-time"? I knew I didn't want to leave my youngest yet, but he wouldn't need me all day. And I knew I wanted to help out at the schools but that wasn't going to take up all my time either. We needed some extra money and I thought maybe it was time to consider working outside the home again. I started researching some different opportunities and settled on real estate. I had a background in real estate and marketing, plus I had kept up on the market over the years since I was sure I would be getting a new house at some point (still waiting on that some point). It is flexible and can allow me to be where I needed to be while still offering a good paycheck. So it seemed like a perfect fit.  I figured out what I needed to do to reinstate my license and I was off and running.

In a few short weeks I had completed my course work, sat for the exam, and signed a contract with a local company. Then it hit me " I've just became a Working Mom" - this suddenly seemed terrifying. Now not only did I have five kids to care for, a house to run, sports and activities to keep up with, and dinners to cook, but I am going to go out and sell houses too. I wondered if I had finally cracked. The pressure of being a Stay-at-Home-Mom of five had finally gotten to me and for some reason I had the crazy notion that going back into the work place was going to make it ok. I quickly began to worry not just about the things anyone would worry about when starting a new job, such as "Can I handle the work load?, Am I well trained?, Will I like the people I work with?, etc."  But coming off of 12 years at home with kids I had a whole other set of worries: Will I say "I need to go potty" to a client?, Where will my kids go when I have to be at training/meetings? What if I can't remember how to use a computer, sure I know how to pin on Pinterest and post on Facebook, but what about Publisher, CRM's, spreadsheets, etc?  What will I wear? Will I start cutting up my manager's food when at a business lunch?, How will all those things I've always done get done? Will someone say I have a blueberry hand print on my chest before I head out to show a house? Will my children learn that they don't need me anymore...........

But after a few weeks of being back to work I have learned a few things:

I have a wonderful husband and kids - they have taken up some of the work at home (the kids aren't always thrilled about it, but they do it). Roy has made sure I have the time to work without worry, getting the kids on the bus and being sure they get dropped off/picked up when needed.  And not once have they let me leave the house with a stain on my shirt.

I have extremely supportive family and friends - they watched kids, shown up with dinners, brought me clothes or took me shopping, listened to me vent, and celebrated each step of my new career with me.

I haven't forgotten as much as I thought I had - it took a few tries but I am just a tech capable as I ever was.

I work with great people - I am impressed with how encouraging everyone at my office is, from my manager who is focused on training to be sure I have the tools I need and that I know how to use them, the office manager who of course as we all know is the backbone to the operation, to the other agents who offer advice and help in everything I do.

Potty is not a ingrained in my speech - I am able to talk to adults like adults and I have yet to cut up anybody's food for them.

My wardrobe still needs work - I will have to admit that after being at home for more than 
12  years I had slowly transitioned my wardrobe to almost entirely casual (and I mean really casual clothing). It only took 4 days in the office to run through every business outfit I owned. But luckily I have some great friends with excellent taste who had clothes to pass on, add in a few trips to the store I now have something to work with. It's a start.

As independent as they are, my kids still need me - they need someone to talk to when they get home from school, they still need help with their homework, someone to help them find their way and provide them guidance, and someone on whom to rest their weary heads after a long day.

And so I am proud to be back at work. I am proud to have earned the right to call myself a REALTOR® and to be a part of the Century 21 Scheetz team. 

Oh wait.......what's that?  To get paid I have to get clients and sell homes?.......Now that's scary!